Over our years of working with people whether it be marriages, addictions, teens, depression, or any other presenting issue, we have seen that there are three pillars that an individual must have in their life in order to support change.  Before they can even establish these pillars, they must first have a strong desire for change. Without having that first, it is unlikely they will do what is needed to establish these pillars.

The first pillar is community.  We live in a culture that greatly promotes individuality and differentiation.  Media and social networks work more to isolate us than connect us.  We are starved for good healthy community.  We need people in our lives who know us in a deep and vulnerable way.  Community can bring about significant healing (12 step addiction groups understand this very well).  Community can be hard to create.  Though you may have been hurt in the past by this community, the church can be a great place to start finding community as it is easy to plug into a small group of couples or individuals.

The second pillar is accountability.  This cannot exist unless you first have a community around you that will hold you accountable to the changes you need.  Counseling can help with this pillar, but others are needed in your life to be a support throughout the week.  There have been so many times that we have been working with someone and discovered that if they had only had a solid community around them with real accountability, they would not have gone down the roads they chose in their individual lives or marriages.

The third and most important pillar is Jesus Christ.  Now that name may cause you to stop reading this or at the very least cause you to raise an eyebrow, but there is no question for us that of the hundreds and hundreds of couples and individuals that we have worked with, the most profound and lasting changes have come to those who have a transformation in their lives through seeking the love, grace and forgiveness of Jesus.  We work with clients that are followers of Jesus and clients who are not and both are able to achieve growth and healing in their lives.  But those who open their hearts to Jesus in a new way while going through counseling in addition to reaching out to community and seeking accountability experience the most exciting change that we have ever been privileged to witness.

These are the three secrets/pillars to significant change that we have seen inside and outside of the counseling room.  If you would like more information on connecting with a counselor and seeking change in your life please feel free to connect with us via email at olivercounseling@gmail.com or online at www.olivercounseling.com.